less of me and more of Jesus

"God may allow His servant to succeed when He has disciplined him to a point where he does not need to succeed to be happy. The man who is elated by success and is cast down by failure is still a carnal man.”
A.W. Tozer

I know I've posted this quote before, but I'm learning this lesson all over again. I feel like these two sentences from Tozer sum up my whole speech and debate season.

Each tournament has been unpredictable. There have been weird rounds, weird judges, unexpected results, disappointments, and thrilling wins. And you'd think that the more losses I had and the more tournaments Ted and I failed in debate, the more eager I'd be to have a win and to qualify for the next level of competition and do really well.

But what's crazy about looking back over my year is that I'm finding the very opposite to be true.

The more I lose, the more I yearn for Jesus to satisfy me. So the more I lose, the more unappealing any satisfaction that could come from winning seems. More of Jesus and less of me isn't, in the end, a painful transition, but a glorious one. Because in Jesus, I find all I need to be happy.

"The man who has God for his treasure has all things in One. Many ordinary treasures may be denied him, or if he is allowed to have them, the enjoyment of them will be so tempered that they will never be necessary to his happiness. Or if he must see them go, one after one, he will scarcely feel a sense of loss, for having the Source of all things he has in One all satisfaction, all pleasure, all delight. Whatever he may lose he has actually lost nothing, for he now has it all in One, and he has it purely, legitimately and forever."
A.W. Tozer

This past weekend at the Regional tournament, I got 1st place in persuasive. But it wasn't as thrilling as I'd expected it to be.
Ted and I also got 10th place in Team Policy debate...just one slot away from qualifying for the national tournament. But I wasn't heart broken like I had expected to be.

I have so far to go, but my prayer is that God would be doing a work in my heart...pulling out all the desires I have for anything other than Him. and putting in its place Jesus. more and more of Jesus. Exchanging the joy of success for the joy of knowing Jesus, the hope of an award for the longing for heaven.